Leaving aside all the logistics involved in navigating a separation between an individual and their partner, the question of children has the potential to further complicate the process. Illinois parents considering divorce must also consider the feelings of their children when the end of a marriage is finalized. Thankfully, there are several helpful techniques that can be used to mitigate these difficult waters.
In the case of a divorce that can’t be described as amicable, it is important for parents to maintain an air of civility around their children. Badmouthing an absent parent can lead children to feelings of guilt if they express love for the parent being denigrated. Maintaining a positive outlook on a child’s mother or father can help children maintain meaningful relationships with both parents.
Additionally, children have a tendency to ascribe blame to themselves when a divorce is on the horizon. Of course, no parent wants their child to believe they are at fault for a separation, so it is important for parents to reinforce the notion that the children are not to blame. It is also important to remind children that both parents still love them, despite the change in living arrangements.
Divorce has the capacity to complicate the lives of children, perhaps even more than their parents, as some Illinois residents are already aware. At the end of the day, however, parents always have the best interests of their children at heart. Ensuring a divorce comes to a rapid and amicable conclusion is a good way to help kids move past this difficult time in a healthy way.
Source: goodtherapy.org, “Divorce, Separation, and Parenting: a Primer“, Ruth Wyatt, April 23, 2014